Sharon’s abuser traveled constantly due to business. He frequently was out of town for weeks even months at a time. During these extended business trips, Sharon would be left with no gas money, no food, and no resources. She frequently experienced long periods of time when her abuser would shut off or not pay for various utilities such as water, phone, and electricity. During these times Sharon would be stressed out about how she would feed, clothe, and transport her children. This continued abuse caused severe depression. Sharon wanted to leave much sooner but her abuser put most of the bills in her name and would never pay them. He only paid the bills in his personal name in order to keep his credit intact. Sharon’s credit on the other hand was absolutely ruined! Therefore, even if she did leave her abuser, she had no credit to obtain housing, a car, or any other services she needed that were dependent on her credit. Her credit even prevented her from getting certain well-paying jobs.

Sharon felt as though she had no options. She had come from humble beginnings. She had put herself through college and graduate school because her family did not have the resources to assist her in obtaining this level of education.

Sharon, a very smart and beautiful woman, had shut down. She was so overwhelmed and depressed that she could not function.  She did the only thing she knew to do. She called HDNBC’s 24-hour hotline looking for help. The advocate who spoke to her could sense the level of stress and depression she was experiencing due to abuse.

The advocate told her to come into the shelter. When she entered the shelter, she could not even think clearly, she cried often and did not trust anyone.  We worked with her slowly only giving her one goal a day, in the beginning, to prevent her from becoming overwhelmed and shutting down. This process began to build trust so that she felt safe with the shelter staff. Her self-esteem and confidence began to build in her own abilities as she successfully achieved one goal at a time. We asked her to start walking daily to help with her depression in addition to taking some antidepressants. She did very well. She surprised us all at how quickly she bounced back and began to reclaim her personal self. One of her greatest achievements was when she was accepted into a highly exclusive certificate program that would guarantee her a well-paying job that would be perfect for supporting herself and her children. However, this program required a fairly hefty enrollment fee upfront. The rest of the money would be taken out of her paychecks once she started working.

Sharon began to despair after all the progress she had made. The lack of finances threatened her yet again.

We worked with her trying to locate funds in every possible way. A day before the deadline for her enrollment, she got a call from one of the agencies we had contacted. They were willing to give her half of the money she needed. In order to get the other half, Sharon sold a piece of jewelry that was very precious to her for a fraction of its worth.

The shelter staff decided we could supply the rest of the money. We told her on the day of the deadline which was also one day before her birthday. She cried and said she will forever remember this as the best birthday gift ever because it was the key that locked away the past and opened the door to her future. Sharon is on her way to living a healthy life free of violence. It just goes to show how quickly one can recover when they have a safe place and people who care.

I think true love conquers all, and there is a lot of love in this agency.